Safe Journey Home

Content Warning: Residential Schools, trauma

Since the finding of the unmarked mass graves of children from Kamloops Residential ‘School’ grounds there has been a resurgence of memories and trauma bubbling up to the surface for many survivors and their families. The numbers are continuing to rise with every institution searched and thus is a continuance of resurfacing trauma among individuals and their communities. Although this is the most upsetting and necessary for survivors and their families, many allies and supporters find themselves at a loss and feeling overwhelmed by this news. No matter who you are, checking in with yourself and loved ones is a necessary step in being able to move forward during these difficult times.

To begin I will note that I am in no way an expert and do not claim to be, the following is just from my experiences and knowledge as an Anishinaabe kwe on my healing journey in hopes that it may help someone else too. However, keep in mind everyone is different and has diverse needs so do not feel bad or hopeless if none of the following helps you.

For those who are Indigenous, just know that it is okay if this is an overwhelming time for you and you need to limit your news consumption and/or feel the need to remain silent on this for now. There are a lot of emotions involved and if one is unable to understand or doesn’t know how to handle such intense emotions, it can be detrimental to their well-being and healing. If possible, participating in any cultural practices that remain or that you know of and use would be beneficial in helping you through these hard times. Connecting with your community to any extent you can, which is more difficult during this pandemic but still possible to some capacity, will further help you and your family cope during these heavy and trying times.

For allies and supporters, it is important to spread awareness and do your share to the best of your ability whilst keeping in mind your own well-being by taking care of your mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical self.

Here are some general techniques to look after oneself when feeling overwhelmed:

The 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique

Begin by looking around and name 5 things you see at the present moment. Then stop to listen and name 4 things you hear at the present moment.

Find 3 things you touch whether that is the feeling of your chair or something in your hands. Then name 2 smells from the present moment.

Lastly, name 1 thing you taste which can be a drink or snack you are having. This grounding technique tends to change your focus and calms you as it brings you into the present moment and may show you a different perspective, thus allowing for clearer thinking.

The 4-7-8 Technique

Breathe out completely. Begin by breathing in through your nose for 4 seconds, followed by holding your breath for 7 seconds, and finally breathing out of your mouth for 8 seconds. Repeat this process three more times or as many times as needed. Deep breathing helps to calm you, ground you, and allows you to reconnect with yourself.

Taking care of your Mind, Body, and Spirit.

Caring for your different aspects of health (mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual) is important to consider at all times if possible. Below are some examples to ensure you're taking care of your health holistically.

Mind - Mental and Emotional: Some ideas include doing some reading, learning something new, doing puzzles, or allowing yourself to feel your emotions and expressing it in some type of way whether that is art, writing, or something else.

Body - Physical: Some ideas include yoga, working out, dancing, doing something else active such as playing sports or going for a run.

Spiritual: Some ideas include meditating, doing any cultural practices that may help you such as smudging in various Indigenous cultures, as well as connecting with your community and loved ones. Doing things you love will also help ease your overwhelming feelings.

Other Ideas

Other ideas may be cleaning your space in any way you can or feel motivated to as ‘order’ around you may help calm you and create ‘order’ within you; taking baby steps, which can only be defined by you and what you see as a big enough step in the moment, also makes responsibilities seem lighter; although it is easier said than done, accepting that what is happening and what has happened is beyond your control will help in the long run as you will be able to better identify what coping mechanisms work best for you in a situation that doesn’t include attempting to control the situation; resting for a few minutes to a few hours as often as needed or is possible will help you recharge and replenish your energy; and finally it is super important to practice self love and care through nurturing yourself and not being so hard on yourself. Self love is resistance to colonial figures and systems and is an extraordinary power we have when it's practiced. The act in itself begins to heal past generations and future generations through the healing of oneself and thus will help you now during these difficult times. It may also be beneficial to remind yourself that you are not completely powerless in most situations as a majority of people are able to have control over their emotions, feelings, and actions if practiced and worked on. You are also not alone and you shouldn't feel ashamed if you need to reach out to anyone beyond family or friends as there are a number of help lines and resources for you to utilize. We can get through this together and I believe in you!

Resources for help

• Indian Residential School Crisis Line: 1-866-925-4419

• Hope for Wellness Line: 1-855-242-3310

• Talk 4 Healing Crisis Line: 1-888-200-9997

• Talk 4 Healing Help Line: 1-855-554-4325

• Kids Help Phone: 1-800-668-6868

Resources for further learning

For those who still don't know about these 'schools', here are some links and resources for you to use to inform yourselves. More resources can be found through Google.

• https://physiotherapy.ca/sites/default/files/indigenous_ally_toolkit_en.pdf https://guides.library.ualberta.ca/residential-schools/home

• https://www.cbc.ca/books/48-books-by-indigenous-writers-to-read-to-understand-residential-sch ools-1.6056204

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Sources:

• BetterHelp. (2020, June 29). 10 Coping Strategies For Anxiety. Betterhelp. https://bit.ly/3zwNf5d

• Gotter, A. (2018, April 20). 4-7-8 Breathing: How It Works, How to Do It, and More. Healthline. https://www.healthline.com/health/4-7-8-breathing.

• Riding Out Intense Emotions. Anxiety Canada. (2020, November 4). https://www.anxietycanada.com/articles/riding-out-intense-emotions/.

• Sussex Publishers. (n.d.). 8 Strategies to Manage Overwhelming Feelings. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/the-savvy-psychologist/202005/8-strategies-manage-overwhel ming-feelings.